Hey, Maxine here,

Firstly, if you have stumbled across this site looking for a pregnancy book and don’t want to read my story about conceiving please click the following link which will take you to a fantastic conceiving book. Otherwise…

I think the time has come to tell my story, which is why I have created this blog – if you decide to buy anything from the links on my pages I will get paid a small commission which will allow me to keep this blog open to help women (and men) who are in the same position I was . I had my first baby at the age of 37 (2004).  Apart from my waters breaking and not going into labour, meaning 2 days later the little one had to be induced it was a great birth. He weighed in at 8lb 13oz and was 2 weeks early – I am really happy he did not go any longer as he would have been even larger After a month or 2 I ended up with an over active thyroid – this emulated in heart palpitations, constant nausea, headaches and shear exhaustion. To top it all off, I was told that because it was OVER active I would lose weight really quickly, the opposite happened.  I was put on medication and told that if that didn’t work then I would have to have radiation treatment (excuse layman terms, it was too long ago to remember).  This meant no conceiving and I wanted to really badly because of my age – I started to really panic and get depressed. For the first couple of months, the medication I was on wasn’t working and I was having quite a bad time of it.  The radiation treatment was looking more and more likely, which I really didn’t want as meant some horrible things:

• No conceiving
• Not being around the new baby – including holding or even being in the same room
• Vomiting
• Chance of actual radiation poisoning (very slim chance they said 1 in 1000 or something)

Well the top 2 were really important reasons not to do it.  I had made up my mind that I was not going to go down that route at all. PERIOD. After a year or so the pills did the trick and I was finally able to start conceiving again, well trying to get pregnant is more accurate.  By this time I was back at work full time, and my lovely parents were looking after the baby for us as my husband and I could not afford child care, or the monthly expenses on one salary.  I don’t know how some people keep conceiving, but have no money. Tangent I know, however, I am sure you know exactly what I mean. I came off the birth control pill, which I had to go onto because of the thyroid medication, and really thought that I would get pregnant straight away because I did with my first child. We started conceiving within 2 weeks of coming off “the pill”.  However, that wasn’t meant to be.  It took another 2 years for me to finally fall pregnant, I was over the moon and nearly 40 (or just turned 40 can’t remember the exact date but close). I couldn’t wait to tell my husband who was also chuffed (happy) at the news. Obviously we kept it quiet from people, and before we could tell anyone I had a miscarriage.  I was absolutely devastated, if you have been through all the conceiving help you can get then fall pregnant and then lose the baby – well, sorry I can’t go on I’m crying…

Ok back again, obviously the emotions are a bit raw still – you will find out why in a little while.

…so convinced I am never conceiving again I get my husband to bed early every night to try. I had read that after a miscarriage you become even more fertile when you next ovualte and chances of conceiving increase.  After a couple of months the sex slows down as I am more and more convinced that I am not going to get pregnant again, I am too old and too fat.  Then mid December I am convinced I am pregnant.  I do not tell anybody this time, not even my husband.  I am keeping everything crossed and hoping beyond hope that the baby stays with me. Alas, the same happens and this time on Christmas day can you believe.  Words can not explain how I felt – I didn’t go to the doctors (do not do this if it happens to you – there could be any kind of things that happen and infections that can stop your chances of conceiving  altogether – I was extremely silly) or even tell my husband until a couple of weeks after it had happened.

I became extremely depressed as I am an only child and so wished for a brother or sister and really didn’t want my little boy growing up with out a sibling. Plus my husband and his sister have such a close bond, I kne it was the right thing to do (well try anyway).  After a couple of months I bucked myself up for the famil that I did have and reserved myself to the fact that if it happened it happened and if not then be thankful for the lovely son I did have.  I wouldn’t be without him for the world and would die to keep him happy.

My husband and I continued to make love, however, not as frequently. Our jobs started to get more stressful as the company started expecting more and more.  I wouldn’t see my husband sometimes for a whole week (5 working days) which doesn’t lend itself well to trying for a baby. A year later he got a new job (same company) however meant that he was local.  This started me off again, and my husband and I decided that we would trying conceiving again for another year. Then we would stop and appreciate what we had.

I had already bought various books over the last few years that just didn’t work, and were more common sense than mind blowing miracles.  However, I got out the purse again (not that we could really afford it) and bought probably another 8 or so books – I probably bought 25 books in total and read them all, during lunch hours and evenings, and tried their techniques, tips, diets etc. By now you can tell I would try anything.

I had never bought an ebook before,but through all my research on the net kept stumbling across various reviews and ads for books.  Yeap, you’ve guessed it I bought a few more, but ebooks this time.  I have not got time to discuss all the bad books I bought, but I am going to tell you the name of the 2 books that I thought were brilliant.  And, it is these 2 books that I attribute the conception and birth of my brand new son.

See my two little men below

Conceiving

The ebooks are immediate downloads and buying through my safe link provides me with a small commission which will help me keep this blog going, these are fantastic books:

Conceiving with Pregnancy Miracle

Conceiving with Getting Pregnant Bible

One final tip from me, buy yourself a Clearblue Easy Fertility Monitor as I also used this and I think the combination of the 2 books and the ovulations monitor got me pregnant.

I’d love to hear your stories – success or otherwise

GOOD LUCK IN CONCEIVING

You may have tried to conceive but with no positive results. Ideally, Mother Nature should take care of conceiving after sex, however, change in lifestyle and way of life may greatly reduce the chances of conceiving due to the effects on the sperm and the egg.

Cigarette smoking

Both first hand and second hand smoke affects the sperm and the egg. To increase the success of conceiving the sperm count should be relatively high and the egg should be fertile. If not, probability of conceiving is reduces considerably.

Smoking damages the sperm and causes egg depletion. In fact, women who smoke are more likely to be infertile than non-smoking women which reduces the chance of conceiving. They are sixty percent more likely to be infertile than women who do not smoke.

Alcohol and drug abuse

Alcohol and drug abuse affect both men and women and thus reducing the chances of conceiving. In men alcohol may cause erectile dysfunction which will prevent the man from having sex and therefore conceiving will not take place and may cause infertility in women.

Marijuana causes erectile dysfunction irregular periods. If a woman has irregular period she cannot know when she is ovulating which is important in ensuring that conceiving takes place

Caffeine intake

With the change in lifestyle, caffeine invariably found in coffee, tea and some sodas which is consumed more and more with the lifestyle change has been linked to fertility reduction in women and, therefore, reducing the chances of conceiving.

Daily food

Taking care of what you eat is important in ensuring that you remain fertile. This is the case of both men and women since it takes both sperm and egg for conceiving to take place. Green leafy vegetables (kale lettuce e.t.c), uncooked nuts such as cashew nuts, walnuts, fresh fruits and vegetables are important in ensuring fertility and eventual conceiving. Nuts and, in particular, Brazilian nuts are good for sperm fertility that improves the probability of conceiving.

Exercise

Working out regularly and perhaps losing weight can improve fertility and lead to eventual conceiving on having sex. The requirement for exercise applies to both men and women equally. The exercise should be consistent. The Recommendation is three times a week of between twenty to thirty minutes at each particular work out. Conceiving can only be achieved by healthy gametes from the man and the woman.

Stress in daily life.

Stress can be the cause of many illnesses. This may even affect the production of the sperm and the egg. Reducing the stress levels may be important in ensuring that the egg and the sperm can actually achieve successful conceiving.

Stress may, on the face of it seem unrelated to fertility and conceiving, but the effects are far reaching in the body system for both men and women and affect their physiology and physical capabilities to have sex and conceive.

Weight issues

With the change in lifestyle and lack of exercise, people tend to gain weight and this affects the health and implications to the health.

Conceiving as you may have deduced by now is dependent on, among other things, the general and overall wellbeing of the individual, whether male or female.

Age factor

Age contributes to the lack of ability to conceive mainly on women due to the eggs produced in terms of the quality of the eggs. For men the main problem that comes with age in terms of intercourse and conceiving is the loss of libido which can be remedied by use of libido enhancers. As for women, the same is difficult due to the age of the eggs. This can be a big cause of conceiving to older women.

Conception is said to take place when the sperm fertilizes the egg. However this is never automatic and, accordingly, conceiving is an area that has been researched into and with such research, there has emerged tips and methods that may improve the chances of conceiving. Sexual positions have been said to increase the chances of conceiving but to that point, the main idea is to have the sperm deposited as close to the cervix as possible.

There is no single tip or method that can guarantee conception, however the chances of conceiving can be increased significantly using the following tips.

Frequent sex.
Women who are having a hard time conceiving may not necessarily be ovulating when they think they are. Therefore, conception may not be entirely up to timing of the ovulation. Frequent sex and, in particular, perhaps three times a week can be an effective way of increasing the chances of conceiving a baby.

Ovulation – the calendar method
The calendar method of timing the date of ovulation for successful conceiving presupposes that a woman has a regular twenty-eight day cycle which is not always the case. Many women do not ovulate on the fourteenth day and if a woman wants to conceive, it may be worthwhile looking at past basal body temperature charts and signs of ovulation for improving the chances of conceiving babies.

Ovulation – Invest in a fertility monitor or an ovulation prediction kit
Fertility monitors read the changes in LH (luteinizing hormone) which is the hormone associated with ovulation and other hormones. Ovulation prediction kit monitors LH surges prior to ovulation. Conceiving a baby is underpinned by the availability of a fertile egg that is produced during ovulation.
Conceiving, therefore, becomes difficult if a couple has intercourse when the woman is not ovulating. Conception is most likely to take place during ovulation.

Ovulation-Sex before or after

Conception is most likely to take place during ovulation. However, after ovulation, conceiving becomes difficult due to the viability of the egg which is about twenty-four hours. Therefore, it is better to have sex before ovulation and this may increase the chances of conceiving due to the viability of the sperm which is about three to five days. This also means that the couple will have sex many times before ovulation to increase the chances of conceiving.

See your Doctor
Ovulation maybe hampered by a pre-existing or untreated infections, sexually transmitted diseases, or poor health. Accordingly, before you have sex with an aim to conceive getting a green light from the doctor will go a long way to ensure that your chances of conceiving are increased.

Avoid alcohol, smoking and drug abuse
Fertility majorly contributes to the odds of conceiving. Alcohol, smoking and drug abuse reduce the fertility of women and, therefore, reduce the chances you have of conceiving.

Orgasmic sex
Achieving an orgasm contributes to conceiving since it is believed that the spasmic movement during an orgasm by a woman facilitates the pulling of the sperm into the uterus which then ensures that conception takes place. It is believed that, for the man, achieving an orgasm will improve the sperm count.

Keeping the sperm in the vagina

Conception is facilitated by the sperm and the egg joining. The longer the sperm stays in the uterus or vagina the higher the chances of conceiving. This is therefore broken down to what sexual position will encourage the long stay of sperm in the vagina. It is believed that the missionary position is the best position to use when trying to conceive since the sperm does not pour out. It may also be argued that placing a pillow under the bottom facilitates the movement of the sperm into the vagina increasing the odds of conceiving a child.

Conception is the process whereby the male and female gametes (being the sperm and the egg) fuse in order to produce a baby. There are a lot of factors involved however when a couple wants to learn all about conceiving a baby.

Conceiving a baby cannot take place without either of the gametes and it is important to understand where each element of conception originates from in order to appreciate the process of conceiving.

The female sexual organs comprise of two ovaries which are glands that store the eggs in follicles. The ovaries lie on either side of the uterus and the eggs are released to the fallopian tubes that connect the ovaries and the uterus. This occurs once a month.
If the egg is fertilized by the sperm (hence conceiving a baby), it implants itself to the lining of the uterus which thickens with every cycle in preparation of fertilization of the egg. If fertilization does not occur the thick wall is discharged from the body as menstruation and it is the period which the woman is said to have her period.

Usually the cervix is blocked by cervical mucus, but during ovulation, the cervical mucus thins allowing sperm to go through in order to complete conceiving of the egg (ovum).

The male sperm is produced in the testes located below the penis. The testes are held in an extension of the stomach called the scrotum to keep the temperature of the testes at least two degrees below the body temperature to keep the sperm count up and improve the possibility of conceiving.

On ejaculation, several million sperm are released but it requires only one sperm for conceiving to take place by fertilization of the female egg. The sperm moves through the cervix and into the uterus and along the fallopian tubes to fertilize the egg in order for there to be any conceiving of an ovum.

Conceiving
When a man and a woman have full penetration intercourse and the man ejaculates in the woman, the sperm travels through the vagina, through the cervix and to the fallopian tubes where it meets with the egg. During the travel to the fallopian tubes, the sperm goes through some maturity that enables the conceiving of an ovum.

After conceiving, the fertilized egg implants itself on the uterus lining and the egg, now an embryo after conception grows sustained by hormones for a while until the placenta grows to nourish the pregnancy.
It is upon the combining of the sperm and the egg that you can say there has been any conceiving of a child.

How to increase the chances of conceiving
Conceiving depends on both the female egg and the male sperm. Accordingly, both have to ensure that they are both in a position to produce a good cell. This can be ensured by doing the following:

Staying in good health
This encompasses eating healthy, stopping or reducing smoking, reducing alcohol intake, regular exercise, avoiding high stress levels or situations and taking time off for rest and relaxation. This improves fertility and chances of conceiving.

Taking care of sperms
Sperm develops best at about 34-35 degrees centigrade which is about 2-3 degrees centigrade below normal body temperature. Developed sperm is important for conceiving to take place

Timing
A woman’s menstrual cycle takes about 28 days and ovulation takes place at the middle point of the cycle which is 14 days. This is the best time to have sexual intercourse to increase the chances of conceiving a baby. However, the woman can be said to be fertile from the 9th day of the cycle to the 14th day.

Body temperature
During ovulation, the basal body temperature, which is the temperature of the body at rest, rises and this, should be monitored as it is an indicator of when you can concentrate on conceiving a child. A couple should have sex just before the temperature rise since it increases the chances of conceiving.
Other ways of increasing your chances of conceiving are:
• Checking cervical mucus that becomes thin
• Ovulation predictor kits
• Having frequent sex

In order to conceive, the sperm needs to fertilize the egg. However, conceiving a child can be made impossible by contraception which is prevention of the joining of the sperm and the egg (ovum) or Contragestion which is the prevention of the placenta formation.

Naturally, it is pertinent to note that, the sperm and egg that are required for conceiving a baby are living organisms that have a limited lifespan and in the case of the sperm is said to be viable for 72 hours and the egg is viable for roughly 24 hours. However, the viability of both depends on the person and the external factors that affect the individual.

Contraception that prevents conceiving a baby may be by use of physical methods or behavioral methods
Physical methods are:
1. barrier methods where a movement of the sperm through the cervix by use of a physical impediment preventing conceiving of the baby;
2. Hormonal methods which involves changing the woman’s hormonal cycle to prevent ovulation and subsequently preventing attempts at conceiving a baby;
3. Ormeloxefine which causes the ovulation to occur at different times with formation of the uterus lining. For conceiving of a child to be complete, the uterus lining is required to provide nutrition to the embryo in development;
4. Emergency contraception that prevents ovulation, conceiving a baby or even implanting of the fertilized egg, intrauterine methods which employ the use of devices placed in the uterus to prevent ovulation and conception;
5. Sterilization which involves the blocking, tying or removing the fallopian tubes to prevent conceiving a child. It may also be done on men to stop the production of sperm.
Behavioral methods are
1. Fertility awareness which is the timing of the menstrual flow to have intercourse when the woman is least fertile. This method is not 100% dependable since conceiving a child can still take place since the sperm stays in the vagina for at least 72 hours.

2. Coitus interruptus which is where the male does not ejaculate inside the woman preventing the attempts of conceiving a baby. However, this method has its limits due to the life span of the sperm inside the vagina and the menstrual duration. Accordingly, conceiving a child can still happen if the sperm and the egg get to join.

3. Avoiding vaginal intercourse which means alternatives like anal, oral and non penetrative sex. Though ejaculation may take place there is no chance of conceiving a child since there is no entry of the sperm in the vagina

4. Total abstinence, which is not having any sexual intercourse at all. This is an absolute way of ensuring that there is no conceiving of a child since there is no sexual activity

5. Lactational which is the period after giving birth that the woman is considered infertile and unable to conceive and it is invariably when the woman is breastfeeding
For the woman there are various factors that would make it impossible to conceive due to the viability of the egg are:
Smoking:
Smoking severely affects fertility and conceiving of babies in women and it is also a major cause for miscarriages. As fertility is a major requirement in conceiving, even if the sperm makes contact with the egg conception cannot take place since they would be no fertilization.

Alcohol
Alcohol like smoking affects fertility and the conceiving of a baby in both men and women. Due to the stress of work people turn to alcohol to alleviate the stress.

Malnutrition:
A healthy diet is important in ensuring that the egg and the sperm are fertile and to ensure that conceiving a baby takes place. The nutrients consumed largely determine the state and fertility of the sperm and the egg.

Ovarian Cysts
Ovarian cysts are cysts usually form during menstruation. This is when a fluid fills the ovaries making conceiving a child impossible due to the fluid around the ovaries. Accordingly, the sperm cannot reach the egg due to the liquid covering the egg. This disorder is not easily identifiable and can go unnoticed.

Difficulties in conceiving are not so common; however, about one in seven couples have difficulties in conceiving a child. There are various reasons for infertility some of which are easily remedied than others.

Difficulty in conceiving a baby despite having regular and consistent unprotected sex usually means that the man or the woman or even both are infertile. Usually it may take up to two years for a couple to conceive and, therefore being infertile cannot be diagnosed within a few months. Invariably one in seven couples does not conceive within a twelve month period of trying. Nevertheless, over half of these may conceive within one year without any intervention or medical treatment. In general if a couple does not conceive within two years of having regular and consistent unprotected sex, doctors may diagnose the couple as infertile which may be as a result of the man’s or woman’s infertility or even both.

In order for conceiving of a child to take place, the egg from the woman (Ovum) has to join with the sperm. The egg is released from the ovaries when a woman is ovulating. Ovulation occurs invariably fourteen days from the start of the monthly cycle. The monthly cycle takes about twenty-eight days. The egg travels down the fallopian tubes to the uterus in preparation of conceiving.

When a man ejaculates into the woman during sex, the sperm travels up past the cervix to the uterus and into the fallopian tube to fertilize the egg to complete the conceiving of a child. On conceiving, the joined egg and sperm form the embryo which travels out of the fallopian tube and attaches itself to the uterus wall and grows maturing into a baby.
Fertility problems can be caused by:
Problems associated with ovulation.
Ovulation is a requirement in conceiving a baby. However, some women do not ovulate permanently while for others, lack of ovulation is sporadic in that it occurs in some months and not in others. Causes of ovulation associated problems that hamper conceiving a baby are, untimely or early menopause, Polycystic ovary syndrome, hormone imbalance (of Prolactin and Thyroxine), weight problems (both underweight and overweight can affect the balance of hormones. Women with anorexia nervosa do not ovulate), Over exercising affects hormonal balance, chronic illnesses (Cancer, diabetes, kidney disorders), side effects of medicine or drugs ( chemotherapy, cocaine, marijuana), smoking. All these may directly or indirectly hamper conceiving a child in one way or another.

Uterine, cervix or Fallopian tube problems can be the cause of problems in concieving and these include, prior infection of the uterus and fallopian tubes (pelvic inflammatory disease) where the actual conceiving of a baby takes place, Chlamydia infection can cause PID that causes scarring and damage of the uterus that affects conceiving the child, previous surgery affecting the reproductive organs, fibroids that may be cancerous will also affect conceiving a baby.

Male problems that affect conceiving of a baby are varied and are mainly concerned with the number and quality of the sperm which is a vital element in conception. The causes of a man being unable to make a woman conceive are, being born without testes or the vas deferens, tumors of the testes, past infections, smoking that reduces sperm count, overweight hormone problems, environmental factors like exposure to x-rays, side effects of drugs (cocaine, heroin, marijuana, chemotherapy, anabolic steroids).

Other general factors affecting conceiving a child in both men and women are age (older women tend to be less fertile than younger women, older men tend to have lower libido), stress has been linked to inability to conceive in women and reduction in libido in men.

Getting help with being able to conceive may be considered however, a couple should not conclude that they are infertile until after two years of not being able to conceive and even then, medical help that enables conceiving a baby can be obtained.

Conceiving a baby is an issue that may be left to chance or may be enhanced by employing various methods to improve the chances or increase the probability of conceiving. Conceiving a baby is a game of probability and these methods are employed to increase that probability in favour of successful conception.

Successful conceiving of a baby pre-supposes the successful joining of the sperm and the female egg. However, this is may not necessarily be easy or taken care of by Mother Nature and, accordingly, many methods and theories of improving the chances of conceiving have been suggested over the years. These are the practical methods which will not leave a doubt in your mind about the applicability and ease of which the chances of conceiving a baby can be greatly improved

Keeping track of the menstrual cycle
Keeping track of the menstrual cycle is the easiest way of identifying which days you will be most fertile to improve your chances of conceiving a child. The easiest way of keeping track of your menstrual cycle is having a menstrual calendar where you indicate the beginning and the end of your period consistently.
You may also be able to identify the signs of when you are most fertile and, in this regard, the most common signs that you are fertile for conceiving a child are; when there is an increase in vaginal mucus which is egg white in texture, softness of the cervix (located high in the vagina) and general increase in your body temperature which may be characterized by fluctuations.. In this regard, once ovulation has occurred, your body temperature will rise.

Making it count
You are most fertile for conceiving a baby five days before your ovulation, on the day that you ovulate and ideally twelve hours after your ovulation. This is the period within which conceiving a child can easily take place.

Making love during this period will increase the chances of conceiving. Making every fertile day count while at the same time pacing yourself to ensure that you do not get drained physically and mentally.

Have orgasmic great sex –
The female orgasm facilitates the movement of the sperm up the vagina to the cervix for the conceiving of a baby to take place. The vagina is invariably acidic and on orgasm the cervix contracts drawing in the sperm from the vagina and to the cervix enabling conception.
Pace yourselves
Sex is great. However, it can also be exhausting and in any case, to increase the chances of conceiving a baby, your man has to have a substantial sperm count. Overdoing it or doing it daily may just cause your partner to have a marginal sperm count which may reduce the chances of conceiving the child.
Safety of the sperm
There are various factors that may reduce the chances of the sperm surviving in the vagina long enough to get to the cervix and thereby reduce the chances of conceiving a child. These factors may be brought about by the use of artificial lubricants, vaginal sprays, tampons that are scented, and which may cause the sperm to die.

Savoring the moment
Although it may be common belief that lifting your legs or placing pillows under your bottom to lift it will move the sperm to ensure conception, this may not be necessary and simply staying in bed for a while after making love is a good idea akin to savoring the moment after love making and perhaps increasing the chances of conceiving a baby.

Though there are many other factors to consider in increasing the chances of conceiving a child, such as stress that may affect the fertility due to the biological effect of stress, the above tips may be a good starting point and practical if nothing else towards successful conceiving of babies.